It’s Valentine ’s Day weekend. Yikes. Because apparently it wasn’t bad enough that there was a whole day devoted to couples, now they need the whole freaking weekend to be in love. Anyway in lieu of sitting around the house in sweatpants watching Bridget Jones and eating Blue Bell out of the carton (...although I may still do that...), I’ve decided to compile a list of fun things for singles to do on this Valentine’s Day (a.k.a. the worst day of the year).
1. Give out valentines to guys you don’t know. Think back to elementary school when you gave out the little paper cards with monkeys on them that say “I’m bananas for you”, now implement that into your college life. I’m sure that guy sitting next to you in World Oceans, the guy that works at the SLC, and the guy in line behind you at the SUB would all love Scooby Doo valentines with your name, number, and email address on them. It’s a way of saying, “hey I’m desperate, but that doesn’t mean you’re special enough to be my only valentine”.
2. Order a bouquet of roses and a huge bear for yourself and have them delivered to your most populated class on Monday. Pretend they’re from your boyfriend and be super obnoxious about it. For example, “Oh my gosh, he didn’t, he did not do THIS, so EMBARRASSING! He’s such a romantic he just can’t help himself, I swear! I’m just so spoiled!” Basically your goal is to be so disgusting about it that not only do you hate yourself a little bit afterward, but that you have completely tainted Valentine’s day for even the most die-hard romantic within a 100 mile radius.
3. Buy a white tee shirt and sharpie. Sharpie the words “I’M SINGLE” on the shirt. Put shirt on. Walk the bear trail. See what happens.
4. Last but not least, one for all of you “This is single’s awareness day, thus I feel the need to do something super dramatic and angsty”: make a video of yourself doing the ugly cry while “All by myself” plays in the background, repeat the words “why am I single, why am I so alone” over and over again. Upload this video to facebook. Not only will every guy you know be well aware that you are “single and desperate to mingle”, your aunt from Phoenix will quit asking you why you’re still single.
I hope that you decide to implement these suggestions into you’re Valentine’s Day. You may not meet a man but needless to say, you WILL have an interesting day.
Peace and Blessings
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=po0svkc5Om0 (A little John Mayer therapy for all of my singles out there)
